Take a Lesson From Ben

“Sometimes it only takes one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life.”   

                             Jackie Chan

Even though this happened years ago, the lesson it teaches is still applicable today.  Maybe now more than ever.  Read it, enjoy it, take it to heart.  

I sat down with a cup of coffee and looked at the pile of papers on my desk.  “Just another typical Monday morning,” I thought. Time to write a to-do list and get a few things done before the phone started ringing. 

My concentration was broken when Rita, a work associate, walked in my office and sat down across from me.  It was the first time I had seen her in several days since she had been in Orlando for a meeting. 

“How was your trip?”, I asked. 

Her eyes widened. “You are not going to believe what happened!”, she said.  

I leaned forward to listen, my interest piqued.  Sales meetings were always good for stories about someone who did something stupid.

 

Rita continued, saying,  “I was in the Orlando airport on Friday waiting on my flight. Then I  looked at the gate across from me and there stood Ben Crenshaw.”

“Wow!”  I was impressed.  At the time, Ben Crenshaw was a major star on the PGA tour. Besides being one of the top golfers in the world, he had All American looks that made him instantly recognizable.  And did I mention that he had recently won his second Masters tournament?  Simply put, he was a big deal.  But more importantly to Rita,  Ben Crenshaw was her son’s favorite golfer.   

He was leaning against a wall with his wife and children waiting for a flight home.  One look at his slumped shoulders and the blank expression painted on his face, and there was no doubt where he had been.  It couldn’t have been more obvious if he had been wearing mouse ears. Ben had undoubtedly just completed a family trip to Disney World.  And as my father used to say, he looked like a sucked orange.   It’s a feeling that anyone who has been to the land of the mouse knows.  After leaving Disney, you need a vacation to recover from the vacation. 

Rita had a problem.  What to do? An opportunity like this wouldn’t come along again.  She was torn between intruding on a tired father who just wanted to be left alone and getting her son an autograph from his favorite sports star.  

Finally, the mom in her won out. She pulled out a legal pad and pen from her briefcase and made the short walk across the concourse.   Hopefully, the father in him would understand. 

Their eyes met, and they exchanged smiles. Rita spoke, saying,” Hi Ben, I hate to bother you, because I can see you’re tired from your trip to Disney World .  And believe me, I know what that’s like because I’ve done it too. But you’re my son’s favorite golfer, and he would kill me if I told him I saw you and didn’t get your autograph.”

Ben smiled warmly and said, “Sure.  What’s his name?”

“Robert.”

“Does he play golf?”

Rita answered quickly. “All the time. He loves it.”   

He nodded, took the pen and began to write on the paper.  Rita expected to get a hastily scribbled signature so that Crenshaw could continue recovering from the Magic Kingdom.  Instead, Ben began carefully writing  a few lines, paused for a few seconds, and then wrote some more. “What’s he doing?”, Rita wondered to herself. “All I wanted was an autograph.” 

Finally, he finished and handed the pen and pad back to her.  

She smiled gratefully, thanked him, and without looking at what he wrote, walked back to her gate.  I guess it’s bad etiquette  for the autographee to gawk at the signature in front of the autographer.  

. 

Upon sitting down, Rita decided to look at the  paper before placing it in her briefcase. Within seconds she was staring at it in disbelief.  

This was not an autograph.  Ben Crenshaw had  filled an entire page with a custom program for her son to improve his golf game. It had tips and suggestions on what to work on and how to practice.  It was a detailed, thoughtful, personal manifesto on how to achieve golfing excellence signed by one of the best players in the world. 

I was touched when I heard this story. Ben gave much more than was asked of him.  All Rita wanted was his name on a legal pad; instead, he took a few minutes to create a cherished keepsake for her son that years later still probably hangs on a wall.   It’s a story of human decency that I’ve told hundreds of times.  Ben Crenshaw was a good golfer but he’s an even better person. Undoubtedly thats why his nickname was Gentle Ben. 

Have you ever received more than you asked for?  How did that make you feel?  Was it affirming?   And more importantly, have you ever given someone more that they asked for?  In this time in which people have so much disdain for one another (especially those who don’t think like us), maybe an extra dose of kindness is what we should focus on. They don’t have to be gigantic.   Holding a door, genuinely engaging a stranger, buying someone’s meal at a drive thru, generously tipping a waitress - the  examples are limitless.  Try to do one thing a day that makes the world a tiny bit better.  

Ben gave Rita’s son a lesson that went far beyond the golf course.  We should also practice it until it  becomes a habit. 

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