Mark & Brian’s Homemade Humor Contest

 

It was 1985. I had been out of college for a decade and was well into my third job, climbing the corporate ladder. However, there was a little voice inside my head that I kept hearing. Clearly, I had an itch in my life that hadn't been scratched. 

When comedians are asked, “Why did you start doing comedy?”  Many times they answer, “I just had to.”  I believe that’s the truth.  However, at the time, the infection that would become stand-up comedy and comedy writing had not manifested itself in me just yet. It was certainly something that intrigued  me - an ember that was fanned by the likes of Johnny Carson, David Letterman, and especially Saturday Night Live. That pull was so strong that I even considered going to Chicago and enrolling in Second City, SNL’s talent feeder program.  But a wife, two young kids, and a mortgage put a damper on that dream. Ah, the road not taken. 

A Birmingham morning radio team, Mark and Brian, were of also of interest to me. I listened to them on my daily commute. These guys not only had great on-air chemistry, they pushed the envelope on what you could say and do on the radio. In addition, their song parodies were spot on - and funny. Since I was someone who could do a number of impressions and make up parody songs on the spot, I was smitten. So when they announced a homemade humor contest with a grand prize of an all expense paid trip to the first-ever Comic Relief concert in Los Angeles, my comedy ember began glowing brighter than ever. 

I knew what I was going to do.  A parody of a Birmingham entertainment icon immediately flashed in my mind.  Yes, it was going to be Country Boy Eddie. 

For those of who don’t know, from 1957 to 1993 Country Boy Eddie ruled early morning television in Birmingham, Alabama. It was a combination of corny jokes, personalized commercials, and hoedown music from his studio band.  He would sing songs with a nasal twang - an impersonation I could do perfectly.

I planned to do a commercial for a Country Boy Eddie concert, making him a rock star who was singing famous rock ‘n’ roll covers. The question was: how? Nowadays, I  could download an app and easily create what I wanted to do; however, in the mid 80s it was much more difficult. I had to get creative. So, I got two boomboxes, one to record, and one to play. Then I found three rock songs with long, recognizable riffs that would enable me to sing along; Born In The USA, Money For Nothin’, and Sussudio by Phil Collins. Playing the riffs from each song, I sang along in my best Country Boy Eddie impersonation. Finally, I did a DJ voiceover describing the details of the concert and ticket availability.  

It took hours and hours, but the finished cassette made it all worthwhile. It was good. Homemade to be sure, but it sounded almost like an authentic concert promotion, and it was funny. 

Some of the contest entries were memorable. Someone took the song “There’s A Bad Moon On The Rise” and changed it to  “There’s A Bathroom On The Right.” They merely sang their modified vocals over the original song, so you could still hear John Fogerty in the background.  It was so bad it was hilarious. 

I breezed thru the preliminary rounds into the finals. I was up against some people who did a song they called the Birmingham Rap - clever, but not that funny. 

The day of the championship round came. Since the winner was going to be decided by call-in votes, I stacked the deck, reaching out  to everyone I knew, begging them to vote for me repeatedly. It was just like a political campaign in Chicago. My wife asked her students to participate. And since everyone in my office had a dedicated phone line, vice presidents to secretaries were calling in the radio station. 

The vote was very close - in the end about a dozen votes decided the outcome. And I lost.  But I did get a color TV for second place.  Still, it wasn’t Comic Relief. However, when I went to the station to pick up my prize, I got some consolation when Mark & Brian told me that my entry was the funniest one. And both of them marveled how I did it with only two boom boxes. 

I entered the contest again the next year, and finished in the top five. By now the ember had been stoked into a flame. Soon, I would be scratching the itch by performing at open mic nites at comedy clubs. Mark and Brian went to LA (that’s Los Angeles, not Lower Alabama) and dominated morning radio on KLOS for many years. Eventually, their success got the pair inducted into the Radio Hall Of Fame. They even have a star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame.  Most of you know what happened to me. 

And if you asked any of us why we did it, I'm sure all of us would say,” We just had to.” 

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